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Apr 04, 2024

BREAKING: Local News Outlet Slanders Mayor's Cowboy Hat

Y’all, we’ve got a problem. Last night, Ken Kalthoff over at NBC Channel 5 said Mayor Eric Johnson wore a “park ranger hat” to a public event. Kalthoff’s report was about the mayor launching an effort

Y’all, we’ve got a problem. Last night, Ken Kalthoff over at NBC Channel 5 said Mayor Eric Johnson wore a “park ranger hat” to a public event. Kalthoff’s report was about the mayor launching an effort to include $398 million in the upcoming bond program for parks. It’s an insane number. In a bond program that’ll hit something like $1.2 billion, with as many needs as the city has, you’re not getting $398 million for parks.

But anyway. The more important matter here is that Kalthoff said in his report: “Mayor Johnson wore a park ranger hat to dramatize his commitment to improving parks. He said it is for families like his growing up in Dallas that could not afford country clubs.”

No! That’s a dang cowboy hat, Ken! We talked about this a couple weeks back when your buddy Jack Fink over at Channel 11 did a report on crime and the mayor wore the same hat. Same hat, Ken! It’s a cowboy hat, likely a Stetson Open Road model.

This is Dallas, Texas. Our mayor has recently made a fashion choice that is objectively awesome. Kalthoff’s mistake on this front is not only shoddy journalism, but it’s a disservice to this great city.

My name is Tim Rogers, and I’m asking you to support the mayor’s new cowboy hat.